This is the only video on the net that truly captures how great a day it was to be an Oregon Duck. Enjoy, and Go Ducks!

Made by jtlight and danzig from Addicted to Quack

USC at Oregon from AT Q on Vimeo.

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Another week down and another crazy shake-up in the rankings. The Bears and 49ers faced reality checks, and I finally gave the Bengals the ounce of credibility they deserve. Due to midterms, I’m keeping the intro short and sweet this week.

Get used to that seat, JaMarcus. You'll be keeping it warm for a while.

On to the rankings.

32 (32) – Rams:
Poor, poor Steven Jackson. 143 rushing attempts on the season and still no touchdowns. Somebody give this man a hug.

31 (31) – Buccaneers:
Tampa Bay can now say they suck in two countries, which is probably more exciting than watching Josh Johnson try to throw a football.

30 (29) – Browns:
In his five games since taking over for the disgraced Brady Quinn, Derek Anderson has posted QB ratings of 30.9, 68.8, 15.1, 51.0, and 36.4. With a completion percentage of 44. Did Quinn beat up the GM? What does he have to do to get back on the field?

29 (27) – Chiefs:
On the bright side, that was an amazing touchdown catch by Dwayne Bowe. Unfortunately, it was their only one.

28 (25) – Raiders:
Andre Ware, Akili Smith, Ryan Leaf, Rick Mirer, Cade McNown, Jim Drunkenmiller, Todd Marinovich, Joey Harrington, David Carr, JaMarcus Russell. Not a good list to be on.

27 (29) – Titans:
Best PR move of the week goes to Jeff Fischer wearing a Peyton Manning jersey to a charity event: “I just want to feel like a winner.” Classic.

26 (28) – Lions:
Cancel your plans and clear your schedules for this Sunday. You don’t want to pick up the in-laws from the airport anyway. Why? St. Louis comes to town. I can barely wait.

25 (22) – Panthers:
Jake Delhomme’s three interception performance on Sunday actually raised his QB rating for the year. Sad. Hey John Fox, Delhomme sucks, your backups are worse, and you have two of the best running backs in the NFL, don’t you think it’s time to try the wildcat? There couldn’t be a better situation.

24 (26) – Redskins:
“I had to go to the senior center and cancel my bingo calling,” said the 67-year-old Sherm Lewis, who last worked in the NFL with the Detroit Lions during the 2004 season. “And I had to cancel my Meals on Wheels today.” This team is a joke. Need I say more?

23 (23) – Seahawks:
Has there been a team more decimated by injuries in any sports the last two years? Other than the New York Mets this year, I can’t think of any. Brutal. I actually kind of feel bad for them, except for when they play the Niners.

22 (24) – Bills:
Did you know Ryan Fitzpatrick has won his last five starts? Me either. Unfortunately, I don’t think that stat alone is going to make Terrell Owens feel any better. Oh well, T.O. is probably working on his next reality show anyway.

21 (21) – Jaguars:
Jacksonville plays the Titans and Chiefs in the next two weeks, teams with a combined 1-12 record. Can you imagine the Jaguars as a 5-3 team? Even if it happened, it would just be a façade because four of their five wins would be against teams with a combined one win (Rams, Chiefs, Titans twice).

20 (20) – Dolphins:
If you’re going to blow a 24-3 lead at home, it might as well be to the Saints. In fantasy news, is it time to take Ricky Williams seriously as a legitimate starting running back? I think it might be.

19 (11) – Bears:
ESPN seriously can’t find somebody better than Jeffri Chadiha to do their NFL Power Rankings. Here’s his weekly gem: “The Bears are 1-3 on the road this season. That doesn’t bode well for their future.” I appreciate all the hard work and analysis you put into that one, buddy.

18 (10) – 49ers:
You know things are bad in San Francisco when Mike Singletary turns to Alex Smith to be the savior. At least Vernon Davis and Michael Crabtree are fun to watch.

17 (19) – Jets:
ESPN’s Michael Clayton: “Mark Sanchez showed great hot-dog security in not fumbling the dog he ate in the second half of the win over the Raiders on Sunday.” Take it down a notch, cowboy, you’re trying too hard.

16 (18) – Texans:
Gun to your head, who has the most passing yards and TDs in the NFL? 99% of people would guess Peyton Manning. And 99% of people would be wrong. The answer? Matt Schaub.

15 (13) – Chargers:
San Diego’s wins are against Oakland, Miami and Kansas City. Their losses are against Baltimore, Pittsburgh and Denver. Just beat one good team and I’ll believe in you, that’s not too much to ask for, right?

14 (17) – Cowboys:
Miles Austin, the undrafted wide received out of Monmouth, is the sole reason the Cowboys have a winning record. He already has almost double the entire yardage from the first three years of his career. Not too shabby.

13 (16) – Cardinals:
Arizona plays Carolina, Chicago, Seattle, St. Louis and Tennessee in the next five weeks. There’s a legitimate chance the Cards could be 9-2 heading into a crucial week 13 matchup against Minnesota.

12 (9) – Falcons:
Hey Matthew Berry, Michael Turner’s looking pretty good, huh? He’s currently ranked 11th behind Ricky Williams, and even Fred Jackson has over 150 more total yards.

11 (14) – Packers:
Green Bay went an entire game without giving up a sack. Definitely good news, but it would be a little more convincing if they weren’t playing the Lions.

10 (12) – Eagles:
Philadelphia actually got outgained by the Redskins. Good thing Andy Reid bought the Costco pack of Butterfingers so he could afford to give one to Antwaan Randle El.

9 (9) – Ravens:
In contrast with recent history, Baltimore has the third highest scoring offense in the AFC and sixth in the NFL, thanks to the emergences of Joe Flacco and Ray Rice. But Denver will provide a huge test this week. A loss would put them at 3-4, with two games still looming against Pittsburgh.

8 (15) – Bengals:
Ok, a 35-point blowout of a playoff-caliber team does a little bit to convince me that Cincinnati is for real.  I still can’t believe Cedric Benson is the NFL’s leading rusher.

7 (6) – Giants:
I’ve been waiting all season to say this: Hey Eli Manning, never go full retard.

6 (7) – Steelers:
That Lamar Woodley fumble recovery was eerily reminiscent to the one a few years ago against the Colts in the playoffs.

5 (5) – Patriots:

I really want to believe the 2007 Patriots are back, but until they do it to a team with a win, I can’t believe it. At Indy in two weeks will be a telling game.
4 (5) – Broncos:
If Denver beats Baltimore this Sunday, you can just go ahead and give him the Coach of the Year Award on the field after the game.

3 (1) – Vikings:
Brett Favre looked a lot more like the Brett Favre of recent memory than the one from the first six games this season. Maybe he forgot he has the best running back in the NFL in his backfield. Speaking of Adrian Peterson, that was one of the best hits I have seen this season.

2 (3) – Colts:
I’m scared that the Colts are going to absolutely destroy my Niners this weekend. Please NFL Gods, have mercy.

1 (2) – Saints:
The Saints are winning games they never would have won before. And how cool was it to see Reggie Bush make one of his signature plays from his USC heyday by jumping a legitimate five yards for a touchdown?

Shameless plug:  If you made it this far, please share this blog with friends, family, or even people you don’t know or don’t like. Thanks!

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I remember going to my first Oregon Duck football game last fall as a freshman. Because of weird scheduling circumstances, the Washington Huskies came to Autzen in just the second week of the season.

If Masoli is healthy, the Ducks will roll over the Huskies.

And being a fan of the Ducks for several years before I stepped on campus, I was well aware of the rivalry and was excited to witness it firsthand.

Soon after entering the stadium, I was quickly thrown into the competitive trash-talking that those clever collegians in the student section like so much. Well, this time we weren’t so clever.

From the very second the first purple-clad player appeared in the tunnel, there was a telekinetic-like power that united the entire stadium; students, alumni, and even children to stand up and chant: “Fuck the Huskies!”

Over and over again. I didn’t even know we were allowed to do that. Looking back, we probably weren’t, but it was too much fun it didn’t matter. The loathing between the two teams was palpable.

Unfortunately, or fortunately, depending on the way you look at it, the dislike quickly turned to sympathy, as the Ducks went all Michael Vick on the Huskies, 44-10. To make matters worse, Washington didn’t win a single game the rest of the season, including a heartbreaker to the lowly Washington State Cougars.

For some reason, the rivalry didn’t feel so much like a rivalry to me anymore after that game. It was more of a business as usual, fifth straight win in a row type of thing.
But the Huskies are no longer a joke. No more Tyrone Willingham or Rick Neuheisel and his March Madness office pools.  Washington now has a legitimate head coach: Steve Sarkisian, who learned from the best of the best in Pete Carroll at USC. Coach Sark finally has the Huskies playing up to their full potential.

Despite going winless last season, Washington had plenty of talent, although most of it was inexperienced. Willingham brought in several solid recruiting classes, including QB Jake Locker in 2006 and receivers Jermaine Kearse and Kavario Middleton last season. He just couldn’t get anything out them. I mean, Locker is good enough that he should be able to win a handful of games by himself.

But now Locker has developed into the player many expected him to become, the West Coast’s version of Tim Tebow, Chris Polk emerged as a talented running back and Kearse has excelled in his first season.

However, the one thing that has kept the Huskies from a 2008 Miami Dolphin-like turnaround is their defense. Although better than last season, the Huskies still rank ninth in the Pac-10 in total defense, allowing 424 yards per game.

And that’s why the Huskies are at least a year away from putting a stop to Oregon’s five game winning streak. Jeremiah Masoli (who should play) and LaMichael James, two of the hottest players in the country, should be able to feast on the porous Washington defense.

With two weeks for the Ducks to rest up, and two weeks for offensive mastermind Chip Kelly to game plan, Oregon should be focused and ready to march into Husky Stadium for their sixth straight win.

Kelly has instilled his mantra of “one game at a time” into his players, as offensive tackle Bo Thran can attest: “They’re just the next team on our schedule.”

The only worry for the Ducks, is adjusting to the unfriendly confines of Husky Stadium. Only one game in their current five game winning streak over Washington came in Seattle.

But Chip Kelly has done a tremendous job preparing this team week in and week out. Going into the Rose Bowl before the bye, many fans were frightened because it was the first road game since the Boise State debacle, but Oregon overcame a lackadaisical first half to win handily.

“We don’t put any more stock in this game than another,” Kelly said. “By that, I don’t mean to diminish it, but we put everything we have into every game. We haven’t done anything different in terms of our approach. It’s a league game. It’s on the road. And that’s enough to get our players up and excited for practice.”

In Big Balls Chip I trust.

Prediction: Oregon 34, Washington 24

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This was one of the worst sports weekends of my life. The Oregon Ducks had the week off, the 49ers were on a bye, the A’s are long gone, and it’s still preseason for the Warriors and the Sharks (wait, we’re two weeks into the NHL regular season already? I had no idea).

Thinks the Chiefs are regretting that Jared Allen trade now? Hell, they probably regretted it the moment they made it.

Without the privilege of watching my beloved Ducks on Saturday, I was forced to watch something only one step below water boarding on the torture scale—Big Ten football. Iowa-Wisconsin, Ohio State-Purdue, Penn State-Minnesota? Gross. And by the way, what’s Michigan doing playing an FCS team in Week Seven?

It was so bad I chose to write my four-page philosophy essay instead. The only reason I retained my sanity through the weekend was the NFL Red Zone channel.

But all will be made up for next weekend, when I travel to Seattle for the first time to support the Ducks in Husky Stadium. Who cares if my seats are in Lake Washington.

On to the rankings.
32 (32) – Rams:

Somebody please tell me why the Red Zone channel kept flashing back to this game during the last few minutes of the Ravens-Vikings game? Really. Did anybody outside of St. Louis or Jacksonville care? Hell, did anybody in St. Louis or Jacksonville care?

31 (30) – Buccaneers:

Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse, they lose to Jake Delhomme’s Carolina Panthers. At home. The only bright spot was Cadillac Williams’ performance, because now my roommate can shut up about him being the reason why his fantasy football team is 1-5.  Your QB is Mark Sanchez! Cadillac isn’t the problem.

30 (25) – Titans:

This team couldn’t find an identity—until this week. They are now officially the best worst team in the AFC. And after witnessing Derek Anderson’s appallingly dreadful performance last week, Kerry Collins had to one-up him. He threw for negative seven yards in 12 attempts. Seriously. How bad can Vince Young be?

29 (27) – Browns:

Just so you get a sense of how truly pathetic Cleveland is, their top performer, according to the Yahoo! Sports box score, was fullback Lawrence Vickers, who had one touch for one yard.

28 (26) – Lions:

Scrappiness can only take you so far when you have almost zero talent. Jim Schwartz is a good coach, but can you really expect them to score even once when their QBs are Dante Culpepper and Mike Stanton and their number one wide out is Dennis Northcutt?

27 (28) – Chiefs:

That’s an odd way to score 14 points. Four field goals and a safety.

26 (24) – Redskins:

Washington has faced a winless team in every single game so far and they are still 2-4. If that doesn’t deserve firing, then I don’t know what does.

25 (31) – Raiders:

This could be the biggest upset in the history of survival football. Servers are still crashing as we speak.

24 (28) – Bills:

You force seven turnovers and still need overtime to score 16 points? Something tells me the Jets lost this game more than Buffalo won it.

23 (19) – Seahawks:

Fourteen total rushing yards. 0-11 on third down. Five sacks allowed. Seventeen minutes of possession. Talk about a bad football team. The bye week couldn’t come at a better time.

22 (23) – Panthers:

Why wouldn’t teams stack nine in the box? Jake Delhomme now has thrown 14 interceptions in his last six games and has a 56.8 QB rating for the season.

21 (22) – Jaguars:

The Jags were 11-16 on third down, outgained the Rams by 230 yards, and had only three penalties for 15 yards, yet still needed overtime to beat the least talented team in the NFL. How does that happen?

20 (17) – Dolphins:

The home team coming off of a bye week theory gets a big test this weekend when the Saints come to town. Not buying it.

19 (11) – Jets:

Congratulations to Mark Sanchez for becoming the first two-time winner of the weekly Simple Jack Award. Hey Mark, never go full retard.

18 (21) – Texans:

Houston made the Bengals look like, well, the Bengals. Matt Schaub has become a fantasy must-start every week.

17 (18) – Cowboys:

The epitome of mediocrity. 3-0 versus losing teams and 0-2 versus winners. Fantasy note: I am never drafting Roy Williams again.

16 (20) – Cardinals:

What is Arizona going to do when they play a team that takes away the pass? Beanie Wells and Tim Hightower are getting it done less than my food situation at home. I’ve been living off of Power Bars and instant oatmeal packets for two weeks. College.

15 (10) – Bengals:

This is what Jeffri Chadiha had to say about Cincinnati in ESPN’s power rankings this week: “Matt Schaub shredded them in their loss to Houston.” Thanks for all the hard work and insight you put into that one, Jeffri.

14 (16) – Packers:

And if his analysis of the Bengals wasn’t enough, Chadiha had this to say about Green Bay: “They still haven’t found a way to protect QB Aaron Rodgers.” ESPN, you seriously can’t find anyone better than this guy?

13 (15) – Chargers:

I hate fantasy football. Losing by three coming into Monday Night’s game, I owned Eddie Royal and Darren Sproles. Thanks to the amazing score settings in my lone remaining undefeated league, I received a total of 1.40 points from the duo, despite a combined three return touchdowns. Is there any activity more popular than fantasy football that causes so many complaints?

12 (6) – Eagles:

Is there anything more embarrassing for a head coach than losing to JaMarcus Russell? I can’t think of anything.

11 (13) – Bears:

Another gem from Chadiha: “Red zone problems killed them in a loss to Atlanta.” My freakin’ 11-year-old brother could have told me that.

10 (12) – 49ers:

Michael Crabtree is starting!! Michael Crabtree is starting!! Michael Crabtree is starting!! Michael Crabtree is starting!! Michael Crabtree is starting!! Yeah, I’m kinda excited.

9 (9) – Ravens:

Baltimore almost completed the greatest comeback of the season. Too bad almost counts for diddly squat. We almost made the playoffs. I almost won the lottery. They almost successfully completed your kidney transplant. You get the idea. Almost isn’t good.

8 (8) – Falcons:

Atlanta and New Orleans could be the most exciting division race this season. Their Week Eight will tell us a lot.

7 (14) – Steelers:

Big Ben is back, thanks to the re-emergence of one of the toughest football players in the NFL: Hines Ward. Man, does he play football the right way.

6 (4) – Giants:

The Saints stomped Eli Manning and the Giants so badly, that New Orleans even let Mark Brunell onto the field. Yes, that Mark Brunell. The one who hasn’t attempted a pass since 2006, and is making just under $5 million this season. Seriously.

5 (7) – Patriots:

This game looked eerily reminiscent of 2007. Have Tom Brady and the boys finally got their mojo back? We won’t find out until they play Indy in Week Ten, but it will be fun to see how many points they can put up at Tampa Bay on Sunday. Is 60 out of the question?

4 (5) – Broncos:

Josh McDaniels for Coach of the Year. That is all.

3 (3) – Colts:

I don’t have anything new to say because of the bye, so I’ll just repeat what I said last week:

The only thing better than Peyton Manning is this article from CNN. For all guys past puberty, Christmas just came early. This could transform college campuses, save marriages, and possibly bring world peace. Seriously, guys, you want to read this.

2 (2) – Saints:

Drew Brees passed for 369 yards and four touchdowns and I was still outscored by my opponent’s QB. I would be mad if I didn’t have such crazy man-love for Tom Brady.

1 (1) – Vikings:

I think someone brainwashed Brett Favre into thinking it’s 2001. He cannot possibly still be this good. So far, this is statistically the best season of his career. Wow.

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I’m worried. For the first time all season. Seriously.

I bought into the hype before Boise State. I was certain Oregon would get their revenge against Purdue. I knew Utah was overrated. I had a feeling the Ducks would step up against Cal. And Washington State is, well, Washington State.

But UCLA? What’s so special about the Bruins?

Costa will need to step up in a big way for the Ducks to win in the Rose Bowl on Saturday

It’s really not that I’m worried about UCLA at all. I mean, yeah, they’re a decent team. Actually, they’re a little better than that. They went into Knoxville and knocked off the Volunteers. And they gave Pac-10-leading Stanford a late scare in Palo Alto. Both pretty impressive.

But in a vacuum, there is nothing about the Bruins themselves that scares me. Kevin Prince? Johnathan Franklin? Terrence Austin? I’m sure they’re nice guys, but man, that’s a whole lot of mediocrity.

So you ask, what could I possibly be worried about? What is it that caused me to stay up late last night, tossing and turning while I pictured what will happen when the Ducks travel to Westwood on Saturday?

There are four things. And any single one of them could be enough to derail Oregon’s Rose Bowl aspirations with a devastating loss at, coincidentally, the Rose Bowl.

Jeremiah Masoli’s Injury

Just as Masoli finally started playing up to his Heisman-like potential the past two weeks, the curse of the Oregon quarterback struck: a knee injury. Seriously, another one?

Masoli came out in the second quarter against Washington State with the Ducks already leading 35-0. So when he came out, the initial thought was they were just resting him and putting in the second stringers in early.

Turns out Masoli has a sprained MCL, an injury that usually takes at least a couple weeks to heal completely. So the Ducks will turn to junior backup Nate Costa as the starter on Saturday. And if things go according to plan, Costa will lead Oregon to victory, allowing Masoli to rest this week and during the open date next week, before suiting up at full strength in Husky Stadium on Oct. 24.

Costa, who was supposed to be the starter last season before re-tearing his ACL in fall camp, has never started before. And the only in-game experience he has, is against the second team during blow outs over Cal and Washington State this season, Portland State in 2006, and during a big loss at USC that same season.

Sure, he has an inspiring story, as he has come back from multiple devastating knee injuries. Sure, he was a top recruit coming out of high school. And sure, he has a career 84.4 completion percentage. But he only has 21 career passes has never started a game before.

Don’t get me wrong, I love that Chip Kelly has enough confidence in Costa to let Masoli rest up and avoid any resemblance to what happened with Dennis Dixon in 2007. It’s just that getting handed the ball in the Rose Bowl with the season on the line is a lot of pressure to deal with.

Playing on the Road

Oregon has had it easy the last month with four straight home games. And for the Ducks, playing in Autzen stadium is an advantage that very few other teams are privileged with.

Before Cal came to Eugene two weeks ago, Jahvid Best told reporters that the crowd at Autzen is the only one that stands out in his mind as having gotten to him.

Former Michigan head coach Lloyd Carr once said, “Autzen Stadium is where great teams go to die.” And trust him, he knows from experience.

So when Oregon travels south to UCLA, it will be their first road game since the debacle in Boise.

The Ducks have had some trouble playing away from Autzen in the recent past, with a 9-9 road record since 2006.

It will interesting to see how focused Kelly has team this time, because Oregon looked lost and overmatched in the season opener against the Broncos.

Injuries in the Secondary

Apparently knee injuries don’t only happen to quarterbacks at Oregon.

Just weeks after team captain Walter Thurmond suffered an ACL ending his season, fellow senior cornerback Willie Glasper succumbed to the same fate. That leaves Talmadge Jackson as the only remaining cornerback with starting experience.

“We just got to plug the next guy in,” Kelly said. “You deal with injuries every day. It’s college football. UCLA’s quarterbacks are banged up. Tim Tebow’s hurt. Sam Bradford’s hurt. It doesn’t just happen at Oregon. It happens everywhere in the country.…We’ve got a lot of guys out so it’ll be interesting to see how this thing finishes up.”

After the defense stepped up following the loss of Thurmond, despite already being without T.J. Ward, they held Cal and WSU to just nine total points, it will interesting to see how the Ducks respond to yet another hit to their secondary. Inexperienced reserves, Anthony Gildon and Chad Peppars will compete for the starting spot.

Playing With Expectations

Oregon has gotten off to many fast starts throughout the decade. But just when they appear to be a serious contender, the Ducks have wilted under the pressure.

For example: 2003, 2006, 2007, and this season, in the opener against Boise State.

Playing with the hype of being a contender for the BCS is a completely different animal than fighting for the Emerald Bowl. The entire country is watching. Every play matters. Just one mistake marks the difference between playing in San Diego in December instead of the Rose Bowl in January.

And now, as Oregon has climbed back to No. 13 in the rankings, they have once again emerged as the sexy, dark horse pick for the national championship.

By all means, I think the Ducks have a great chance to run the table and end up in Pasadena on New Years Day, or possibly better. But it’s up to Chip Kelly to have his team focused for every single game, whether it’s UCLA or USC.

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I wonder what’s sorer right now: Brett Favre’s almost 40-year-old right arm, from throwing all over the Packers defense, or his nuts, from getting sucked on by every commentator in the history of football, especially Mike Tirico, Jon Gruden, and Ron Jaworski last night. The love fest was sickening.

The man love for Favre last night was palpable.

From how the Monday Night Football announcers called every single play, it was as if Favre just parted the Red Sea. Actually, to those guys, Moses doesn’t have anything on Brett Favre.

For those of you who aren’t social media friendly, I highly recommend getting a Twitter account, just so you can follow all of the Favre bashing its millions of users are simultaneously tweeting. Here are some of the best from last night:

“Flag for playing defense against Brett Favre.”

“For his next trick, Brett Favre will cure cancer, heal the sick, and give sight to the blind.”

“If you’re just tuning in—Brett Favre is playing very well for having three middle-aged men sucking him off at once.”

“Judging from the radio, Favre is going to find Boomer Esiason waiting in his hot tub with a bottle of wine after the game”

“BREAKING NEWS: In place of ESPN’s 30 for 30 series, there will just be 30 documentaries on how great Brett Favre is.”

“Favre had time to retire and unretire three more times while in the pocket on that play.”

“When anyone but Brett Favre throws a ball eight yards on 3rd-and-13, it’s the worst crime a QB could commit. When Favre does it, it’s genius.”

“Honestly, it’s like Tirico, Gruden, and Jaws are David Letterman and Brett Favre is a ‘Late Show’ intern.”

“Have to turn channel—three-and-a-half hours of Favre worship is all I can handle.”

You get the idea. On to the rankings.

32 (32): Rams

Kyle Boller’s QB ratings by season: 62.4, 70.9, 71.8, 104 (in 55 attempts), 75.2, 63.2. Yeah, he’s the guy that’s gonna turn the franchise around.

31 (28): Raiders

This just in: I think JaMarcus Russell just overthrew another receiver. In other news, Oakland hasn’t scored a touchdown in two weeks.

30 (31): Browns

Hey Rich Gannon, you know overtime is sudden death, right?

29 (29): Buccaneers

Raheem Morris is still young enough to play Madden with his buddies, right? Well, I hope he doesn’t play with his Bucs because he’ll find out that his starting quarterback in real life is rated a 57. Not a good sign.

28 (30): Chiefs

Matt Cassel: Your garbage time all-star of the week! After throwing for 57 yards in the first three quarters, Cassel decided it was time to step up and save his stat line by throwing two touchdowns in the fourth quarter. Sadly, he still finished with 127 yards and a completion percentage of 47. Way to earn your paycheck, buddy.

27 (27): Lions

Detroit gave up 48 points despite allowing only 276 yards. That has to be some kind of record. But on the bright side, you just talked Matt Forte fantasy owners down off the ledge. That’s gotta count for something.

26 (26): Panthers

This might be the only time I say this all season: Jake Delhomme didn’t throw an interception this week! Don’t worry though, Jake—you’ll make up for it this week.

25 (22): Bills

Randy McMichael, Greg Camarillo, and even teammates Fred Jackson, Josh Reed, and Derek Schourman all have more catches this year than Terrell Owens. Hey T.O., how are you liking Buffalo?

24 (24): Redskins

I’m not sure which is more embarrassing: needing a second-half comeback to beat the Bucs at home, or the possibility of losing back-to-back games against the winless Panthers and Chiefs.

23 (18): Titans

“There’s an old saying in Tennessee—I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee—that says, fool me once, shame on—shame on you. Fool me—you can’t get fooled again.” Now I finally understand what George Bush was trying to say.

22 (23): Seahawks

Seattle’s O-line is hurting more than Lindsey Lohan when she tries to think.

21 (25): Dolphins

If only they could play the Bills every week. Their next four games are the Jets, Saints, Jets again, and the Patriots. Think they might put some pressure on Chad Henne? Yeah, me too.

20 (20): Cardinals

After having Kurt Warner, Larry Fitzgerald, Anquan Boldin, Steve Breaston, and Tim Hightower all on one fantasy team last season (yes, I won the league), boy, am I glad I didn’t buy into Arizona this season.

19 (19): Texans

Their defense really isn’t that good, and the Raiders are horrible, but to hold Oakland to six points and 165 yards is pretty good. Even better? Oakland’s top performer, according to the Yahoo! box score, was Darrius Heyward-Bey—with one catch for 18 yards.

18 (21): Jaguars

I played a fantasy team this weekend with David Garrard and Mike Sims-Walker. Thank you, Tennessee, for turning an easy win into my first loss of the season.

17 (15): Cowboys

Their defense made Kyle Orton actually look good. ‘Nuff said.

16 (17): Bengals

If I hear one more time that they’re one play away from being undefeated, I’m going to explode. This team is not that good. Let’s see how they do in Baltimore next week.

15 (10): Packers

Lost in all the man-love for Brett Favre, Aaron Rodgers had a fantastic night despite a horrid O-line. I’m pretty sure he knows by now what Jared Allen ate for dinner last night.

14 (8): Chargers

Hey San Diego, it was nice of you to show up in the second half. I didn’t think you were gonna make it.

13 (13): Steelers

Dear Pittsburgh secondary, thank you for allowing Philip Rivers and Antonio Gates to lead the most improbable comeback in fantasy football history. Sincerely, I Love Lamp, 4-0.

12 (14): Bears

Biggest fantasy goat of the week: Chicago wide receivers. They put up 48 points, and not a single player had more than 32 yards.

11 (11): Falcons

Huge test this weekend in San Francisco. This trip to the Bay Area should be a little harder than last year, when they played the Raiders.

10 (9): Eagles

Why sign Michael Vick and deal with all that media backlash if you aren’t even going to use him? They had the perfect opportunity when Donovan McNabb was out. With Donovan returning soon, at least Vick will have more time to devote to his PETA spokesman duties.

9 (16): Broncos

I wanted to see Denver break the top 10 this week before they lose every game until nine. New England, San Diego, Baltimore, and Pittsburgh. If they even go 2-2 during that stretch, they’re for real.

8 (12): 49ers

I don’t know if it’s because I like Mike Singletary, I picked up the San Francisco D/ST and Vernon Davis last week, or because I am a Niners fan, but I love this team. I expect at least 10 wins and a playoff win this season. Is that too much to ask?

7 (7): Jets

Hey Mark Sanchez, never go full retard.

6 (1): Ravens

That stop at No. 1 didn’t last very long. That being said, I expect them to bounce back and win that division by at least three games.

5 (4): Giants

Good news, fellow Eli Manning haters. Plantar fasciitis plus cold weather will make for a tough month for the spoiled younger Manning brother.

4 (6): Colts

In other Manning news, Peyton is quietly solidifying himself as the early favorite for MVP.

3 (5): Patriots

Give Tom Brady time in the pocket, and he’ll make you pay. With his receivers getting healthy and chemistry forming on defense, New England will once again be in the mix come January.

2 (3): Saints

Drew Brees, you’re killing me. No touchdowns in two straight games? But what’s bad for my fantasy teams is scarier for the rest of the NFL. The Saints are winning with defense and the running game.

1 (2): Vikings

If I hear about how much fun Brett Favre is having one more time, I’m going to stab somebody with an ice pick. Seriously, we get it. Brett Favre is the best football player in the history of the NFL. Now can ESPN move on to more important things, like the WNBA finals? Wait, those are over already? I had no idea.

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It’s official: Oregon’s offense is back and flying higher than ever. Which means the Ducks are the team to beat in the Pac-10, and even more importantly, they have forced their way firmly back into the BCS picture.

Yeah, it was that kind of night for Washington State.

Fresh off of a 39-point thrashing over then ranked-No. 6 Cal, Oregon completely obliterated Washington State 52-6 Saturday night, making the Cougars look eerily similar to the team from “The Waterboy” before stutterin’ Bobby Boucher arrived to save the day.

After an initial scare on the opening kickoff (again), the Ducks were all business, completely outclassing a defenseless Cougar sqaud who couldn’t help but watch as the Oregon offense moved the ball at will, compiling 505 yards of total offense.

Jeremiah Masoli kept the Washington State defense guessing as he executed Chip Kelly’s spread-offense to perfection, completing 14 of his 18 passes for 115 yards and a touchdown.

He added 56 yards and a score on the ground, before giving way to Nate Costa midway through the second quarter leading 35-0.

With the Ducks’ offensive line constantly creating holes larger than Phil Knight’s safety deposit box, the talented stable of running backs couldn’t help but have a field day. And I mean everybody.

LaMichael James, Remene Alston, Masoli, Andre Crenshaw, Kenjon Barner, Costa, and even Jide Shinaba all were effective carrying the ball.

Five different players found the end zone as Oregon rushed for 316 yards on 60 carries, averaging just under six yards per rush.

As impressive as the Ducks offense was, the defense was even better. The unit allowed only 139 toal yards, with much of that coming in garbage time.

They forced nine punts, recorded four sacks, came up with two interceptions and did their best to keep Washington State off the scoreboard entirely.

So putrid was Washington State’s offense, that they fumbled the ball on their only play that went longer than 12 yards.

The Cougars only touchdown came after Scott Brady called for a fair catch and muffed the punt at his own 2-yard line. And even then, it took Washington State three tries to get in.

“We wanted the shutout real bad,” rover Javes Lewis said. “But in this type of game, it doesn’t really matter.”

After a hectic week dealing with both on and off the field issues, the Ducks had reason to let down.

Two days prior, the possibility of a LeGarrette Blount reinstatement came about. And at the beginning of the week, they learned that cornerback and team captain Walter Thurmond would be lost for the season.

But the Ducks quickly suppressed any chance of a letdown by scoring touchdowns on six of their first seven drives.

“Our letdown was Week One,” Lewis said, referring to the 19-8 loss at Boise State that precipitated Blount’s infamous outburst. “You learn your lessons through pain, and we had a lot of pain that game.”

Despite being written off by the voters following that demoralizing loss on the Smurf Turf, the Ducks have steadily improved each game.

After squeaking past Purdue, the defense shut down a Utah team that carried with them the nation’s longest undefeated streak. And then last week, the offense came alive as well, when the Ducks put together a nearly perfect game against Cal.

Oregon couldn’t have picked a better time to hit full steam, because they are entering the make-or-break portion of their schedule next week. They travel to UCLA to face the Bruins, followed by Washington, USC, and Stanford.

In the past, the Ducks have been known to crumple under the pressure of lofty expectations, but this year is different. Why? They are armed with a weapon they have never had before: a shutdown defense.

So now, sitting undefeated atop the Pac-10, and climbing their way back up in the polls, Oregon has once again returned as a team to watch in the BCS…and this time, not just because of their uniforms.

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Oregon head coach Chip Kelly made it clear this morning that the decision to possibly reinstate Legarrette Blount has nothing to do what he can do on the football field. Instead, he is wholly concerned in the character of his senior tailback.

Curious timing? Yes. But Kelly made the right move.

Kelly announced that if Blount adheres to strict behavioral and academic “ladders”, there is a possibility he will gain an opportunity return against Stanford on November 7th.

“This is not a football decision, this is a human being decision. It’s about that individual,” Kelly said Friday. “And he’s got a lot of things he’s got to do.”

Under NCAA guidelines, Blount’s punch of Boise State player Byron Hout would have warranted just a one or two game suspension. But it’s what Blount did before and after the punch that proved to Kelly that Blount needed a major character improvement.

It is no secret that Blount has had off the field issues before, as he was previously suspended over the offseason and has had troubles with his academics. Those issues, combined with Blount’s actions leaving the field at Boise State, forced Kelly to make a swift decision to suspend him for the entirety of the season.

So that raises the question, why would Kelly suspend Blount for the remainder of the season if he had plans for a possible reinstatement? Wouldn’t an indefinite suspension be more appropriate for the future credibility of Kelly and the Oregon athletic department?

Not according to Kelly.

“Legarrette needed to understand there was a finality to it. I only used strong language to show LG the importance of the situation.”

Say what you will. Kelly flip-flopped. Kelly wouldn’t be considering a reinstatement if the Ducks were out of the BCS and Pac-10 races. Kelly isn’t experienced enough to make such a difficult decision.

But from sitting in the first row at the press conference this morning, I could see the honesty, integrity, and thoroughness in which Kelly handled the situation.

After the initial suspension, Kelly had no plan to reinstate him. He even expected Blount to pack his bags and take off back home. But Blount stepped up, took responsibility and stuck around. He even reached out to Kelly on September 4th, asking for Broncos head coach Chris Peterson’s phone number so he could call and apologize.

Two weeks ago, Kelly saw a possibility for reinstatement. The fact that Blount continued practicing with the team, while working on his off the field issues proved to Kelly his desire to remain a part of the Oregon football program.

Which is why after speaking with Tony Dungy, John Gruden, Harry Edwards, and several other notable NFL authorities, Kelly decided if Blount can do what he has put in place for him, he deserves a chance to play again.

But Kelly was very sure to emphasize that this is no guarantee.

“There’s a distinct possibility he’ll never play football here again,” Kelly said. “But the ball is in LeGarrette’s court.”

Kelly justified his change of heart on the suspension by saying, “if I only suspended Blount for 4 games, I couldn’t change it to 12. But this way, if he proves he deserves it, he can be reinstated, with the approval of Larry Scott.”

Which is also no guarantee. Kelly has not talked to Scott, the Pac-10 commissioner, but feels whatever he rules will be the correct decision.

Personally, I feel Kelly handled this excellently. He sent a message to Blount, and the rest of the team, that this behavior will not be tolerated. He also has given Blount a chance to earn back his reinstatement, something I feel Kelly will judge very carefully.

And now the ball is in Blount’s court to prove that he deserves a chance to come back and represent the University of Oregon as a football player.

According to Kelly, “discipline is about behavioral improvement, not about punishment.”

I couldn’t agree more.

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Is Washington State still a Division-1 team? Sometimes I forget.

When you’ve only won one road game since 2007, needed late-game heroics to squeak past a winless Washington squad for their only Pac-10 win in 2008, and a 30-27 home win against Southern Methodist a few weeks ago qualifies as a major upset, sometimes you’re left out of the spotlight.

Oregon outscored the Cougars 126-21 in their last two meetings, expect more of the same.

Which is why, when Oregon, fresh off a 42-3 shellacking of then No. 6 Cal, hosts the Cougars this Saturday, they might as well be playing against South Eugene High. Hey, at least the Axemen are undefeated.

So what do I expect to happen this Saturday in Autzen Stadium? A complete, total, no mercy, shove-it-down-your-throat beat down.

Washington State has proved to be a doormat against Pac-10 teams the past few seasons, averaging an impressive 51-8 loss last season in conference play. And the Ducks have certainly been a part of that, winning four of their last five contests against the Cougars, including a 63-14 win last season in Pullman and 53-7 defeat at Autzen in 2007.

After the Oregon offense sleepwalked through the preseason, the Ducks found their form against Cal, playing an absolutely perfect game on both sides of the ball. And even more importantly, gaining the confidence they will need to challenge for the conference title.

“On offense, the sky’s the limit for us,” QB Jeremiah Masoli said after the game. “We’re the only ones who can hurt us. These last couple of weeks we’ve been in a funk, but today we moved past that.”

With Masoli finally remembering that Ed Dickson is on the field, LaMichael James emerging as a weapon out of the backfield, and Chip Kelly feeling more comfortable with calling plays as a head coach, there is little chance that the nation’s last ranked defense will be able to slow down the high-flying Ducks’ offense.

Unfortunately for the Cougars, their offense isn’t much better than their defense.  They average 314.3 yards per game and have committed 13 turnovers, leading to a paltry 17 points per game, good for 109th in the Football Bowl Subdivision.

The biggest reason for their offensive woes has been bad quarterback play. Last year, the position played so poorly they were forced to resort to their intramural teams for depth. And this year hasn’t been much better, receiving below average performances from senior Kevin Lopina and sophomore Marshall Lobbestael.

But head coach Paul Wulff thinks he has found a solution in freshman quarterback Jeff Tuel.

Tuel will become the first freshman quarterback to start at Washington State since Drew Bledsoe in 1990. He earned the start with a strong performance after replacing Lobbestael against USC, going 14-for-22 for 130 yards and one interception. He ran nine times for 34 yards and was sacked four times.

So now that Oregon has climbed back to No. 16 in the AP poll after a two-week absence, expectations are once again riding high. Which is why anything less than an absolute blow out against the Cougars would be a massive disappointment.

Of course, after a huge win, there is always the possibility of a let-down game. But Kelly has his troops focused, with players buying into his mantra of “one game at a time.”

“Last week was a great memory that we created,” Kelly said, “but that’s all it is.”

Here’s to another great memory on Saturday evening in Autzen Stadium.

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My lovely girlfriend drove up with me this weekend to see me off back to school in Oregon and how did I repay her? By watching football, more football, football video games and then even more football. I actually feel kind of bad, considering she is not a football fan. Let’s just say, when I said the Cowboys are playing on Monday Night Football, she asked me, “Who are the Cowboys?”

But don’t you worry; I made it up to her. And now I’ll make it up to you by delivering the funniest, most informative NFL Power Rankings you will read all week (as long as it’s the only one).

Truer words have never been spoken

32 (32) – Rams – The only thing more depressing than the Rams season is the latest episode of Entourage. Turtle got dumped, Drama had a heart attack, and E had an STD scare. Who wrote this, Joseph Merrick?

31 (31) – Browns – Take a look at Cleveland’s team stat leaders. Brady Quinn has 400 yards, Jamal Lewis has 95, and Braylon Edwards has 139. Those would only be mildly impressive for one game. Somewhere Matthew Berry is crying.

30 (30) – Chiefs – There’s a legitimate chance that Kansas City won’t get a win until week 9. They play the Giants, Cowboys, at Washington, and San Diego.  On the bright side, kicker Ryan Succop is perfect so far on the season.

29 (28) – Buccaneers – Does Raheem Morris really think Josh Johnson is the answer to his team’s offensive woes? I mean, he’s not even the best Josh Johnson in the state of Florida.

28 (25) – Raiders – The only reasons JaMarcus Russell is still starting are Charlie Frye and Bruce Gradkowski. Is the QB from “Glee” available?

27 (29) – Lions – Detroit Fans celebrated the victory like it was 1999. Unfortunately, they won’t be doing it again for a while as they face Chicago, Pittsburgh and Green Bay the next three weeks.

26 (24) – Panthers – This messed me up last night: the Jake Delhomme drinking game. Take a shot every turnover or three and out. Man, that second half was a killer.

25 (26) – Dolphins – Forget Chad Henne, play Pat White! Yes, you might not be very good, but you wouldn’t be anyway, and you’d instantly have the most exciting quarterback since pre-prison Michael Vick.

24 (20) – Redskins – First in free agency, last in the NFC East. After back-to-back pathetic performances against two of the worst teams in the league, the Lions and Rams, Washington gets a chance to play three more winless teams in row. This could get ugly.

23 (22) – Seahawks – So much for being the sexy sleeper pick in the NFC West. Seneca Wallace looked absolutely terrified that the game came down to him leading a two-minute drill against one of the NFL’s toughest D’s.

22 (21) – Bills – One week after getting his first touchdown for Toronto, T.O. get’s another first: his first game without a reception in 185 contests. Good news though, “Beast Mode” comes back next week.

21 (22) – Jaguars – Even with the win, my buddy Alon has finally come to the conclusion that Jacksonville sucks right now. Good for him.

20 (16) – Cardinals – After losing to the Steelers last February, Arizona is suffering a Super Bowl hangover worse than if Courtney Love and Artie Lang had a cocaine-infused love child and then 19 years later sent it off to college at Arizona State.

19 (17) – Texans – The offense has finally found its groove behind Matt Schaub, but the defense is giving up a league high 436 yards per game. It should be fun on Sunday to see who can suck more, JaMarcus Russell or Houston’s defense.

18 (18) – Titans – I wonder how quickly Kerry Collins could down a 6-pack. 3 minutes? 5, tops?

Legendary

17 (23) – Bengals – They’re a fluke catch from a white wide receiver away from  being 3-0. And I had them at number 32 in the preseason. I’m still not buying it 100%, but I owe Cincinnati an apology.

16 (19) – Broncos – I know they haven’t played anybody yet, but after all that has been said about how terrible their defense would be, it’s pretty impressive that they’ve allowed only 16 points in three games.  Unfortunately, there’s a pretty realistic chance they will be 4-6 after week 12. The upcoming schedule is brutal.

15 (14) – Cowboys – Did what they were supposed to do against the rotting corpse of Jake Delhomme. Don’t be impressed.

14 (13) – Bears – Hey Chicago, it feels pretty good to finally have a real quarterback, doesn’t it?  Although it was fun to see Jay Mariotti complain about Kyle Orton and Rex Grossman on Around the Horn.

13 (6) – Steelers – I know the loss of Troy Polamalu hurts, but come on, the Bengals, really? Give the man a Coke Zero, and get him back out onto the field.

12 (12) – 49ers – I’m sold. Going into Minnesota and giving the Vikings all they could handle was impressive. And even more importantly, Vernon Davis finally flashed the potential that made him the NFL’s highest paid tight end in 2006. With Frank Gore out for three weeks, this is Davis’ chance to really step up and carry the offense.

11 (7) – Falcons – Tim Hightower, Kevin Smith and pothead Ricky Williams are all ahead of Michael Turner in fantasy points this season. This makes me smile.

10 (15) – Packers – I wonder how many hours this week ESPN will spend hyping up Brett Favre’s first game against Green Bay. How many hours are there till Sunday? Yea, that many.

9 (9) – Eagles – Michael Vick said after the game that his return to the field (and two incomplete passes) was a top three moment in his career. I’m guessing he’s not counting his dog-fighting career. What, too soon?

8 (8) – Chargers –

Ron Burgundy: Discovered by the Germans in 1904, they named it San Diego, which of course in German means a whale’s vagina.
Veronica Corningstone: No, there’s no way that’s correct.
Ron Burgundy: I’m sorry, I was trying to impress you. I don’t know what it means. I’ll be honest, I don’t think anyone knows what it means anymore. Scholars maintain that the translation was lost hundreds of years ago.
Veronica Corningstone: Doesn’t it mean Saint Diego?
Ron Burgundy: No. No.
Veronica Corningstone: No, that’s – that’s what it means. Really.
Ron Burgundy: Agree to disagree.

Is any of that football related? No, I just thought it was funny.

7 (11) – Jets – Mark Sanchez is the first rookie quarterback to ever start 3-0. Of all the quarterbacks in NFL history, Mark Frikkin’ Dirty Sanchez. I am an Oregon fan, remember?

6 (10) – Colts – Arizona might not have the most impressive defense, but what Peyton Manning did on Sunday was pretty damn impressive. You can give them the previously and perennially overrated AFC South right now.

This Ravens team is hungry. I wonder how Big Ben's uniform tastes.

5 (5) – Patriots – Now that’s more like it. Without Wes Welker, Tom Brady and New England outclassed Atlanta in every facet of the game. Even grandpa Fred Taylor had over 100 yards and a touchdown.

4 (4) – Giants – The G-men held the always dangerous Tampa Bay offense (ha) to just 86 total net yards. That’s almost as bad as Keanu Reeves’s performance in “Much Ado About Nothing.” Keanu doing Shakespeare? Uckkkk.

3 (3) – Saints – New Orleans blew out the Bills despite a human performance from Drew Brees, by running the football and playing solid defense. That’s frightening.

2 (1) – Vikings – Only Brett Favre would command a career highlight reel during a football game he wasn’t playing in. I almost gagged.

1 (2) – Ravens – This Ravens team is scarier that Keifer Sutherland’s voice in Phone Booth. That still gives me the chills just thinking about it.

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